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Assholes Finish First #2020

Assholes Finish First From the Tucker Max website What do you do when you ve become rich and famous for writing a best selling book about your drunken sexual misadventures I ll tell you what I do I write another fucking

  • Title: Assholes Finish First
  • Author: Tucker Max
  • ISBN: 9781416938743
  • Page: 240
  • Format: Hardcover
  • Assholes Finish First By Tucker Max, From the Tucker Max website What do you do when you ve become rich and famous for writing a 1 best selling book about your drunken, sexual misadventures I ll tell you what I do I write another fucking book.This is that book Assholes Finish First is hilarious in ways you will recognize from I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, and in other, newer ways you won t Of course iFrom the Tucker Max website What do you do when you ve become rich and famous for writing a 1 best selling book about your drunken, sexual misadventures I ll tell you what I do I write another fucking book.This is that book Assholes Finish First is hilarious in ways you will recognize from I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, and in other, newer ways you won t Of course it has all the sex and debauchery you expect from my writing, but with a twist You already know how I deal with women when I am poor and anonymous You have no idea how I do it when I have money and fame.It also answers the hard questions you ve never thought of asking What s it like to have sex with a midget How about two of em What happens when you eat too much beef jerky and then drink a gallon of vegetable juice Or get head in an X ray machine The answers are inside, they are absurd, and they are the product of one man s experiences My name is still Tucker Max, and I am still an asshole.

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      Published :2019-01-08T01:08:17+00:00

    1 thought on “Assholes Finish First

    1. The second book just makes Tucker seem like a one trick pony While his first was pretty damn hilarious, AFF is just a pitiful look at a middle aged douche who doesn t quite know how to grow up While Tucker IS a filthy pig, I feel less disgusted by him than by the hundreds of gutter skanks who have willingly and stupidly chosen to be his cum dumpster Tucker, for the love of god just stop with the filthy hookers A little funny and a lot less about vaginas, please.

    2. Trees died for this Without question, this is the worst book I ve ever read and, if even ten percent of what Max writes about is true, he is one of the worst human beings I finished this piece of crap only due to the same fascination with which people view an automobile crash.There is no repeat no redeeming social value here Take a pass on this one, folks.

    3. My first finished book of 2016 Will this book give you inspiration to become a better person and live a better life No Will this book provide insightful and thoughtful stories that will change your life No Will this book make you laugh out loud for hours at a time ABSOLUTELY You can call Tucker Max an ass hole all you want, but he is pretty darn hilarious Although, I did get mildly annoyed by him by the end of it so I would recommend to read this in small doses.

    4. If you know me then you know I am a truly good person who doesn t break the law or do drugs I am not promiscuous, and I don t drink a lot Having said all that I love Tucker Max He is irreverent and honest Yes, he is that smart and if he were to use his powers for good the world would be a better place but far less interesting He probably wouldn t even like me because let s face it I don t fit his ideal girl and I m not a guy That s fine I don t want to sleep with him or hang with him I just want [...]

    5. I saw this in the airport and was sucked in my the title The title is far literal than you can possibly imagine, although besides wealth, there is nothing first about this repugnant prick, except first hardcover book I ll ever rip up and toss I won t even recycle it, because the pages could never be bleached enough to eliminate the stench of pathetic tool the weeps from every line I am less of a person after reading this trash I m ashamed that I gave this douchebag money He is the worst kind of [...]

    6. You know what s worse than all the haters dogging out Tucker Max for being a self proclaimed misogynist skank who gets action than a toilet seat It s all the women he sleeps with because of said attitude Even though I m sure his stories are exaggerated, I have no doubt that a good portion is true And you know what else They re hilarious I mean c mon The baby starts crying The mom looks worried I offer to help her make the baby stop Stydie is skeptical, Tucker, do you even know what to do with a [...]

    7. Shame on this publisher for capitalizing on the bigoted, misogynistic, exaggerated rants of this psuedo story teller MAN CHILD I really wanted to laugh along with his antics, but by 50 pages in, I was too disgusted with his lack of humanity and immaturity to continue If his aim was to offend, he succeeded As I flipped through the rest of the book, I realized that it was just a few hundred pages of the same without any redeeming chapters that might prove he has a thoughtful reflection in his chi [...]

    8. I picked this up at the airport because I needed some light reading and was in a rush I couldn t imagine that someone would publish such drivel, so I was expecting irreverence and debauchery with maybe a little something to make it interesting I was expecting maybe a modern day, lightweight Bukowski.What I got was party tales of a frat boy though I m not sure if he was actually in a fraternity and heaping helpings of drunken debauchery, but nothing that was actually interesting or funny enough t [...]

    9. I m rating this 4 stars merely because of its genre Tucker Max made me laugh, inappropriately throughout the entirety of the book, and I must say, for a completely arrogant, entirely narcissistic individual, he is incredibly gifted with intelligence, wit, and literary prowess It s almost as if he were accidentally blessed.

    10. Tucker Max is the kind of guy that no father wants his daughter to meet Ever He shows no respect for human beings and is very condescending towards everything That shouldn t come as a surprise, considering this guy is writing about all the sexcapades he s had during the years Sadly enough, one would think that even guys like him would eventually grow up and mature Not Tucker Max He s the epitome of a predator Taking advantage of girls when they re drunk and even soliciting sex on his website whi [...]

    11. Diary of a bully kid School bullies quite often grow up to get their JD s from sports crazed frat schools like Duke University in North Carolina Less often do such law school graduates forgo the fat paychecks from corporate law for the publish or likely perish world of professional writing This differentiation separates Tucker Max from the herd of the perhaps millions of men who pursue the hedonistic pleasures without personal responsibility that Max so enthusiastically relishes in One can only [...]

    12. I wish I could give it 1 1 2 stars, because I did laugh a couple of times especially the first chapter, assuming it was true There I was at BN, doing last minute shopping, and the title sucked me in The first couple of pages amused me Anyone who has been to the BN in Seattle knows the first floor is below street level and phone service stinks There was no way to do a quick check of reviews or to Google the author Had I done so At first, Tucker Max reminds me of guys I used to hang out with when [...]

    13. Not as mortifying horrifying as I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell and therefore, not as enjoyable However, I still let out audible gasps at parts and laughed out loud, so I m not asking for those hours of my life back More of the real Tucker Max is exposed he is no longer a one dimensional, drunk, sex enthusiast He writes about two relationships and how one day he wishes to get married and have kids I found myself turned off by all this information Part of the charm of IHTSBIH was his unapologetic [...]

    14. A far cry from the writing and stories that made him famous in the first place, there are only 2 really original laughoutloud stories, with the rest being either rehashed reprintings or lazy compilations of paragraph bad jokes or anecdotes without context You can miss this one.

    15. Tucker Max is a very American author And I mean that as a way to explain why he is so famous Despite the fact that I had never heard of him until I saw the trailer for his movie starring Logan from Gil Girls, and even then I had no idea who he was and never bothered to find out, until I saw I Hope They Serve Beer In Heaven on the floor in front of my friend Lily s bookshelf in the new apartment she was moving into in the UP, and had an aneurysm and read it Tucker Max is pretty amusing He s got s [...]

    16. Wow, this book was hard for me to rate If I rated it on how much I like Tucker Max as a person, he would get a big fat ZERO stars However, if I m honest, the book is hilarious, albeit disgusting, chauvinistic, and many negative adjectives Tucker obviously thinks much higher than he ever should, and gets big laughs out of making others feel like crap On another note, who am I too look down on him too much when I am laughing out loud while reading some of his exploits To be honest, I think that w [...]

    17. So Tucker Max is, among other things, a self described asshole He s been called worse, I m sure, and he helpfully provides a great deal of evidence to support such a descriptor As with his fist book, I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, this is a collection of personal anecdotes, all of them involving drinking and or sex in some way I can t say that I condone the Tucker Max lifestyle as presented in this book, nor do I think he should be a role model or anything But, man, this shit is entertaining Wh [...]

    18. My boyfriend lent me this book which he hadn t entirely read himself to give me something not depressing to read as I tried to fill the time at a boring job The first account in the book, of the author being an obnoxious college student with a megaphone, made me laugh out loud and gave me a weird sense of nostalgia Another account involving an RV in Harlem and several early internet fans was really entertaining as well But I guess as a fairly mature female with empathy for others whether they re [...]

    19. Quite disappointing The book is full of the author s stories about drinking too much and having so much sex he could have accounted for half the US population had he not been using contraceptives Max is moronic, myopic and wouldn t know metaphysics if it went up his digestive tract and sat festering in his mouth for week I actually read through quarter of the book before i started skimming The stories are meant to be funny but barely hit the smile cracking point All you are left with is an impre [...]

    20. I enjoyed this Though maybe not as funny as his first, I still laughed, and it kept me turning pages I would recommend Tucker Max s first 2 books to anyone along with another fun book, Permanent Obscurity by Richard Perez.

    21. Tucker Max the Homeric Hero.I m not too high falutin to admit it I ve been known to pick up an enjoy a Tucker Max book from time to time, and last night I finished his latest, Assholes Finish First The short review love him or hate him, the man knows how to tell a story, and he s got a knack for a turn of phrase one of my favs from the book he has sex with a thin woman and says it was like falling into a pile of brooms , and, as with any bar room flirt, there seems refreshing solidity to his per [...]

    22. Honestly wasn t expecting much from this book I ve heard from others that the later Tucker Max books don t live up to the first Is Tucker an asshole that makes you feel really bad for some of these other people YesIs the book mostly the same as the first Yes Is the book funny If you have a certain sense of humor The first half of this book was repetitive if you ve read his first book The second half is a small change of pace and deals with how his life has changed since writing the first book Th [...]

    23. I haven t read I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell his first book but have been following Tucker on Twitter for a while he was mentioned by one of my very favorite Authors so I figured why not give him a follow No matter how infrequently he posts over there I never fail to laugh or agree with what he has to say So when my husband and I were on our anniversary trip and found ourselves in a used book store to pick him up a beach read, and there was Tucker Max on the front table, I encouraged him to buy [...]

    24. I love Tucker Max for many reasons his brutal honesty, his hilarious antics, his poignant metaphors, and his ability to make me feel good about my life despite all the stupid shit I ve done over the years.A few of my favorite quotes She was the type that would cockblock endangered pandas at the zoo Ladies, be honest with yourself about who you are and have the courage to be that person If you want to fuck, then go fuck If you want to get drunk, get drunk And there is nothing wrong with sucking a [...]

    25. This is the second book I read by Tucker Max The guy is a a complete womanizing asshole who writes funny stories about what happens in his life, mostly about sex with random sluts He s a jerk to everyone, he made a poor drunken college girl pay for a whole new bed for him when she accidentally peed in it sorry buddy, I would have told you to fuck off and consider it a risk of bringing the drunk girl into your bed and to write it off as a business expense since he put it in the book later , speak [...]

    26. Sadly, where I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell was a funny compliation of truly hysterical, and well told stories of the drunken misadventures of Tucker Co, with humorous interludes detailing Tucker s unique style of transient romance , Assholes Finish First is a disappointing follow up Far less a compilation of sponteaneous antics and drunken shennanigans, AFF comes across as much Tucker s narcisstic homage to the self, wrapped in tales of disposable conquests, which, from anyone else would be bo [...]

    27. Hands down, this book is a blast Of course it s not for everyone You re either going to love it or absolutely hate it If you re a feminist or some what of a feminist, run the opposite direction of this book, for it will probably and most likely offend you Now, I don t drink at all or party or sleep around nor do I find these things enjoyable but Tucker Max is such a swell writer that his stories all involving those three things just sucked me right in His life style and way of thinking is defini [...]

    28. After a brief discussion with Doug, the book as a whole was alright I found most of the first half funny The majority of Post Fame Sex Stories wasn t anything great The fact that I can recall about ten stories from Beer in Hell and about five from AFF Assholes Finish First should tell you something I know I hyped this book up for many of you sorry I tend to think books and movies are better than they really are immediately after reading them It takes a couple of days for it to all settle And now [...]

    29. If you ve Read Tucker Max before, you know what to expect If you haven t, Tucker Max is Violently offensive A complete tool Bowel looseningly hilarious.This book is like all of Tucker s writing If you are a prude, you won t get through the first 20 pages If you aren t, you still might not get through them The contents might make you scream, shout, and repulse you completely.But I ll be damned if this is just not completely hilarious.To get a taste of what to expect, visit TuckerMax If you are ea [...]

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